How to maintain a strong bond with your nearest and dearest when wedding planning
Wedding planning is supposed to be fun and a great way to get your friends and family helping to plan your big day. However, there’s a certain amount of stress involved in every wedding and the added input of friends and family can quickly cause tension between you and your loved ones. Avoid wedding dramas and try these tips to keep a strong bond whilst wedding planning.
Parents or friends too involved? Control their input
Let’s be honest here, even though it feels like your loved one is trying to take over your wedding and force their ideas, the likelihood is they’re only trying to help because they want the best for you. Try listening to what they have to say. When we’re in the midst of stress it’s easy to just assume everything they’re saying is just to contradict us but a lot of the time there’s some good advice in there that can really help with your planning, particularly from older relatives or friends who have already been through their wedding.
If you feel like they really are too involved and trying to push their ideas on you, remember to stick to what you want and don’t let people sway you too much. You can still get people’s opinion without having to change what you want. How about narrowing down the suppliers for each area to 3 or 4 you really like and then get their input in your final decision? Or, get them to help you pick out the best paper for your stationery without having to get their opinion on your design. That way everyone feels involved without you having to compromise.
A lot of arguments and tensions are caused by everyone wanting to help you plan, which sometimes involves having big opinions on what you should and shouldn’t have! Be clear about your theme, wants and style from the very beginning so everyone knows the sort of thing you’re going for. Create a pinterest board, mood board or just some scribbles about your ideals that everyone can see and base their ideas on. This way any suggestions will hopefully at least be close to what you’re looking for.
If a loved one is super set on something they want you to involve, don’t feel like you have to change everything but maybe see how you can incorporate elements of that into your wedding. For example, if your sister loves rustic wedding invites but you’re more interested in a modern look, how about trying a rustic crest with yours and your partners initials but on a sleek and minimalist design?
At the end of the day, it is your wedding so what you want is the most important thing. There’s no need to shut someone down every time they offer their input but be firm on what you’re looking for.
We all know that when we’re frustrated, we tend to take it out on anyone who happens to be near us. Try and keep your stress levels down by eating a healthy diet, exercising plenty and drinking lots of water. Make sure you give yourself as much time to plan as possible so you’re not trying to rush through everything last minute.
Delegate tasks to your Maid of Honour, bridesmaids and family. Let them take on things that you’re not as particular about, such as putting together wedding favours once you’ve decided on what you want, organising the hen do (making sure they know what you do/don’t enjoy) or helping you to source specific styling elements. Not only will this reduce the pressure on you but it will help them to feel more involved in the planning.
Plan some down time with your bridal party that doesn’t revolve around your wedding. Go out for a meal or some drinks, watch a film, get a massage or just take some time to hang out with your friends without the stress and constraints of wedding planning.
Everyone involved in planning your wedding will be there because they care about you and are a big part of your life. For your parents and family, they’ll have watched you grow and have always had an input into what you do, so of course they will want to be part of your wedding. Your bridesmaids are there as your sisters and best friends who have been by your side through thick and thin. No matter how much everyone might stress you out during wedding planning, don’t forget the only reason they’re here is because they’re invested in you and your happiness.
When tensions are getting high, get everyone together and look through old photographs, watch home videos or just reminisce about fun times you’ve spent together. As a big sister, I argue with my siblings all the time but one look through videos of us as kids and we’re all laughing and making fun of each other again. Its easy to get caught up in all the details of wedding planning but don’t let that make you forget the ties you have with your loved ones.
Stationery and organizer: Lorna Boyer
Venue: Ladywood Estate, Oakham
Photography: Purple Rose Photography
Photography: Birches & Pine Wedding Photography
Dresses – Bridal Reloved Leicester
Hair and Makeup – Leanne Fitches Makeup Artist
Bouquets, headbands, flowergirl wand – Charlotte Laurie Designs
Cake – Amara Cake Boutique
Bracelets – Sam Ryde Jewellery
Jackets – Ophelia Rose Handpainted
Circle ‘Forever by my side’ sign – BrambleSky
Thanks for Reading
Written by Lorna from Lorna Boyer Designs
Looking for help planning your outdoor wedding? Take a quick look at our brand new online planning sessions available in the upcoming weeks with co-founders Emily & Alan. Sign up to The Planning Sessions here.